Two Posts in one day!!

I know this is the second post today but I have to add this.  I was looking up a few things about adoption today and I ran across this...

                                LEGACY OF AN ADOPTED CHILD

Once there were two women who never knew each other
One you do not remember, the other you call Mother

Two different lives shaped to make you one
One became your guiding star, the other became your sun

The first one gave you life, and the second taught you to live it
The first gave you a need for love, the second was there to give it

One gave you a nationality, the other gave you a name
One gave you a talent, the other gave you aim

One gave you emotions, the other calmed your fears
One saw your first sweet smile, the other dried you tears

One made an adoption plan, that was all that she could do
The other prayed for a child, and God led her straight to you.

Now, which of these two women, Are you the product of?
Both, my darling, Both, Just two different types of love.

- Unknown

I can honestly say from the bottom of my heart that I am already in love with this little one that God has chosen for our family.  I never dreamed that you could love someone so much that you don't even know yet.  It's truly amazing and we both know that God is all over this.  We pray daily for the birthparents.  Even our children are specific in what we pray for each of them.  I can't wait to meet this special little one and add them to our family.  I never realized our family wasn't complete.  So thankful for a God who knows better than we do!! Thanks again for following our journey!

BBQ

Well this weekend we had our first "non official" BBQ fundraiser.  Bobby was originally just going to cook one boston butt on friday night and use it to make some brunswick stew.   A friend of mine said that her dad wanted to buy one if Bobby would cook an extra.  Then she said that her mother in law would like one too.  So I decided to put a little post on our facebook page and see if anyone else would be interested in buying one.  I told everyone that all proceeds would go toward the adoption.  It was so last minute that we really needed to know within a few hours who would want to participate.  We ended up having a great response and between the BBQ sales and a couple of unexpected donations, we were able to raise $300 for our adoption fund!!

                                               Before

                                               
                                                            After

 It was very exciting to see our fundraising thermometer rise again!!  Our first donation was from the paypal donate button for $50.00.   We can't even express how thankful we are for all of our friends that have been so supportive of our decision to adopt!!  Right now we are trying to get a T-shirt fundraiser together hopefully real soon.  We are so excited about this one and already have something in mind for it.

Our First Home Study Visit!!!

Today was the THE day!!  Our first home study visit.  I will have to say I was very excited about the visit but I was pretty nervous as well.  As it turns out, I had absolutely no reason to be nervous.  It went just as smooth as silk!  She got here about 3:30 and the first thing she did was "interview" my boys.  She really just asked them a few questions like.. Do you know what I'm here for, Do you know what it means to adopt, How do you feel about adoption, Are you excited about getting a baby brother/sister, Do you think your parents are good parents, and finally... How are you disciplined when you do something you aren't supposed to do?  Thankfully both boys understood and answered all of her questions. Our social worker seemed satisfied with all of their answers and after about 5 min with them,  their Mimi got them and they went to the park and to get dinner.  They had much more fun getting out of the house rather than sitting here for the next few hours trying to be quiet.  The whole visit was about 2 1/2  hours so it would have been a nightmare for them to be here the whole time. Ha!!  First she sat down with us and we went over all of the paperwork that we have been getting together for the last couple of weeks.  She answered some questions we had and gave great advice about several things to help us finish up with the paperwork.  Then she asked us a few questions about how we decided to adopt, how did we think parenting an adopted child would be different than parenting a biological child ( Hard question), and how would we manage parenting if this child was different than our biological children.  She went over some safety things with us that we need to make sure we have.  You have to have a fire extinguisher, a smoke detector on each level of the house,  you have to have a separate safe for ammunition and guns, medicines up high enough so a child can't reach it, cleaning supplies behind a childproof lock...etc.  Most of these we already have so that's good!  Then lastly she walked through the house.  That's all.. just walked through.  She didn't look in any closets, cabinets, drawers.  I had no idea what all she would do but I was just under the impression that it was going to be alot more "intimidating" than it was.  So all that nervousness was for nothing:)  Now she will meet with me in a couple weeks by myself and then with Bobby a couple weeks later by himself and by then hopefully we will have the FBI fingerprints back and can move forward and get all of this to our agency!!  I know this seems like alot of  info but I want to be able to look back at this one day if I forget and also who knows who else may run across this blog and be wondering what a home study is like:)

A Football weekend

We have had a great weekend!!  Friday night we went to the Eastside homecoming game to see our niece who was on the homecoming court for her sophomore class.  She was beautiful!  The kids had a great time watching the game and spending time with friends and cousins.

 Saturday started our cold and raining but that didn't keep us from heading out to our church for our last flag football game of the season.  All of the kids had a blast playing in the rain.  The adults...not so much:)  Thankfully it only rained the first few minutes and both boys teams won their games.  Bobby's team finally pulled off their first win of the season.  He was coaching 4-7 yr olds and most of them had never played before but had a great time learning.  Bobby was great with the kids and really enjoyed every minute of coaching them.  After the game, we had our awards ceremony and all of the kids got trophies.  Camden was extra thrilled because this was his first trophy!!  He was so proud of it!  Jaxon has had others in the past but was excited about this one too!

 Saturday night we went to my parents house for homemade chicken enchiladas and got to spend time with my sweet sweet grandmother.  She is the most amazing lady in the world!! She is my last grandparent living and just adores my boys.  It's so sweet to watch her with them and I know how much they love her too.  Then today of course was church.  We had a great service and some sweet friend had their precious baby dedicated to the Lord this morning.  It brought tears to my eyes (but what doesn't:)) as I sat there thinking that we will get to do that again one day!! When we got home Bobby said that as he watched the dedication, he was imagining our family up there doing that very same thing again one day and that he couldn't wait!!  I'm so thankful to have such a wonderful, Godly husband that is on the same page with me about the adoption.

First fundraising opportunity

YAY!!! We finally got our Donate button added to the blog!!  I am including our fundraising letter so that each of you could understand a little more about how we got to this point and the adoption process as a whole.

 Dear friends and family,

     Hello from Bobby and Tiffany Ray.  We write with great joy and big news to share… We're adopting!!  About 2 months ago we began a journey of faith to bring a child into our family through adoption.  The possibility of adopting had been on our minds for years but even more in the past several months.   About a year ago, I asked Bobby how does someone know if they are being called by God to do something.  He said "well it would be something that you had on your mind all the time and couldn't get away from it no matter how hard you tried."  I immediately began to cry and knew from that moment on that God was calling our family to adoption.  

I can honestly say for a full year, it was in my thoughts constantly I tried hard to run from the idea. While we were filled with excitement, at the same time we were filled with fear.  We felt comfortable with our life now and wondered how would this change our lives as a whole. What about our plan for our life?  Our kids are 10 and 7.  They are both in the "easier" stage of life and we all know each others routine.  This seemed so much out of MY comfort zone! We also wondered.. could we afford another child?  Better yet, how could we afford adoption at all?  As the year passed, I still had it on my mind a lot, although it wasn't something that we discussed often at all.  As a matter of fact, NOT at all.  One day I had been overwhelmed with the feeling and had prayed and cried about adoption all day.  When Bobby got home that day, I told him that later I had something I needed to talk to him about.  He immediately walked over to me, hugged me and said "It's about adoption isn't it?  I asked him how in the world he knew that and he let me know that it had been on his mind as well and he would LOVE to pursue it!! I am typically not a person of change and we realized this would be a HUGE change!  We realized then that God was calling us out of our comfort zone.  I read somewhere that God doesn't call the qualified, he qualifies the called!!!

Through all of our fears, we felt God graciously guiding the way.  All in his perfect timing, he led us to the right articles and books, allowed us to speak with others who have recently been down this road, and to spend time in heartfelt prayer, seeking his perfect will.  In September of this year, we filled out an application and were approved with an adoption agency.  The adoption process is completed at different stages.  First we are required to have a home study.  The home study is tons of paperwork and 3 visits done by a social worker that will determine if we are suitable to be parents.  At this time, we are in the middle of doing our homestudy.  During this time we are required to prepare a "Dear Birthmother" letter and a profile book with photos and captions that tell all about our family.   When our home study is complete, our profile book will be sent to the agency and at that time we will be put out there to be "matched" with a birthmom. The process could take up to a year or more but we are praying for less time than that.  Isn't it awesome that God already knows who, and when:)  Bobby and I feel so honored that God has chosen our family to raise a child that otherwise may not have a loving, Christian home. 

 

This is the reason we are writing this letter: would you pray about how you can help bring this little one home to join our family?  The domestic adoption process is very expensive and we knew from the beginning that we couldn't do it on our own.  We also know that If God calls us to do something, he will provide!!  Between the home study, agency fees, travel, hotel expenses and attorney fees, the cost will be about $25,000.  

We plan to cover the cost in a few ways:  first we are living frugally and plan to save as much of our income as we possibly can for the adoption.  Second, after our home study is complete, we can apply for adoption grants, Also after the adoption is complete we will apply for a federal tax credit which will equal about $12,000.  And finally, we will be fundraising and asking for donations.

Would you be willing to help us bring our child home?  We are asking for any donation that you may be able to give.  No amount is too small.  We are humbled and appreciative of your gifts in any amount.  Also, donations are tax deductible.  You can also find out about upcoming fundraisers and follow our adoption journey at our website  www.fourwantingmore.blogspot.com   

Most importantly we are asking you pray for us and our child.  The adoption process is filled with both joy and anxiety.  Our ultimate prayer is that through our adoption, God's glory will be made known.  Please pray that we will trust and obey God through every step of this journey.  

Thank you in advance for your love and support, 

Bobby and Tiffany Ray

A New Beginning

Well here it goes! My first attempt at blogging. All I can say is I'm not making any promises:)  The reason we created this blog is to keep track of our journey to adoption and for other people to be able to follow our journey as well.  Bobby and I feel like God has been calling our family to adoption for several years now. It's something that has been brought up many times between the two of us but we always just "talked" about it.  About 2 mos ago, I began to realize that I could no longer run from the calling and we both prayed about it and decided it was time to follow the call.  On Sept. 23, 2013, we filled out our application for adoption with Nightlight Christian Adoptions.  Since then, we have filled out paperwork, and more paperwork, and more paperwork.  No really...it's a ton of paperwork.  We are in the middle of our homestudy now and we have a social worker coming out next week to start the homestudy meetings.  We are absolutely ecstatic about this next step in our life and our boys are thrilled too.  Recently several of our friends have had babies and our boys are getting in some pretty good practice!!