Just another update!!

     Well we finally have our last homestudy visit tomorrow! Bobby will be meeting with our social worker for his individual interview.  She says after this, it will take about 3 weeks to get everything typed up and sent to our agency.  YAY!!
     I finally finished our profile book and ordered them.  When I got them in the mail a few days ago, I immediately noticed a couple of spelling mistakes:(   I was so frustrated because I have worked so hard to get this done and really thought that I hadn't missed anything.  On the page that I had to work with, the writing was so small and it was really hard to see any mistakes.  When I spoke with our adoption agency, she recommended that we correct the mistakes and have another book printed.  We printed 3 books... one for us, one for the agency to keep and mail out if need be, and one for them to show birthmoms.  I knew then, that would mean that I would have to pay for the 3 books to be reprinted again.  I really didn't want to have to do that since I had just 5 days before paid for 3 books!!!  I decided to call Snapfish.com and ask tell them the situation and see what they could do.  My moms motto is "It never hurts to ask", and I'm so glad I did! The nice lady said that she would credit me the amount I originally paid and I could make the changes and order the new ones at no additional cost.  What a blessing!!!  So, hopefully tomorrow I will get those new ones ordered and as soon as we get them, I can send that to our agency.  I just found out that once they receive that, if they have a birthmom and we meet her criteria and vice versa, they will start to show it!!!  If someone happened to be interested in us before they receive our completed homestudy, they would still be able to contact our social worker and get the approval.  I can't believe we are getting so close to being able to have our profile shown!!  It's hard because we are all ready NOW but we know God's timing is perfect and this will all fall into place when HE is ready.  Thank you so much for all of your prayers.
     Also, we are trying to figure out the last few details about selling t-shirts.  Hopefully sometime in January we will be able to get that fundraiser going.  Bobby is hoping that we can sell a good many and then he would like to have another fundraiser where we sell BBQ plates and everyone that has a t-shirt can wear it to the BBQ!! Sounds fun huh:)  We have a design in mind for the shirt and it will have a bible verse about adoption on it.  We will try and post pics of the design sometime after Christmas.

Thankfulness & sweet boys!!

Happy Thanksgiving!! We all have so much to be thankful for.  At the beginning of November we decided when we do our nightly devotion with the kids that we would all name something we were thankful for and we have written it down each day.  We plan to read over them all today around the table and remember again just how blessed we are.  Our lists were very different between the kids and us but the kids even caught on after a couple of days and started looking deeper than just family and friends.  We have everything from our church, our pastor, friends, family, heat in the winter, a/c in the summer, shoes, a bed, food, salvation, the Bible, families that raised us in church, spouses, the opportunity to adopt,  God, children, health, xbox, electricity, our home, job schedule, good renters, dishwasher, different seasons, clean sheets, Friday paychecks, well you get the point... but I could go on and on!  It really made us think each day and try to come up with something different than what someone else had mentioned.  The boys both mentioned the adoption and the baby several times.  They can't hardly wait for all of this to really happen.
      I have to say that both of my boys have such sweet hearts.  They have been saying for the last few days that they wanted to give some money towards the adoption. We both told them that they didn't need to give their money for that.  They have both been saving for certain things and I like for them to know the value of money by saving and then actually seeing how it's spent ( and how fast it goes:)  Well a couple of days ago, Jaxon asked me if I had an empty jar anywhere.  I told him yes and where it was.  The next thing I know, this is what I see in my living room.

Camden made the sign on the left ( I love it) and Jaxon on the right.  They emptied their piggy banks and gave some of their cash.  We counted and it was $29.55.  They were so excited.  I told them again that they didn't have to do that and they both said "We WANT to do it mama, this is our baby too"  They absolutely melt my heart! I love that they thought this out and knew this is what they wanted to do.  Now they want all of our spare change will go in there so that's what we will be doing.  Great idea kids!
    I know it's a long waiting process for them. It is for us too but we are all waiting patiently and maybe it will happen sooner than we think.  Camden is so excited that when we finally get to take the baby home from the hospital, we will get to stay in a hotel with it.  HAHA!! I'm not sure why that's so exciting to him but he talks about it all the time!  We will have to stay in the state of South Carolina (that's the state we are going through) for 7-14 days until the ICPC is complete.  The Interstate Compact for the Placement of Children is something that controls the movement of a child from one state to another.  Both GA and SC will have to approve the child's movement in writing before you can take the child across state lines.  From what I understand, it can sometimes be closer to the 14 days.  Yikes!!!
After that though, we will be able to bring our sweet baby HOME!!

Long overdue post!

I have been meaning to write a post for the last couple of weeks and have just been so busy that when I think of it, it's so late that I'm just ready to crash.  We had our second home study visit a couple of weeks ago and it went well.  She gathered some more paperwork, made sure we had gotten the fire extinguisher, locks for cabinets, moved medicines out of reach, had working smoke alarms, etc....  Then she sat down with me for about 45 minutes and we just talked.  She asked me to go into a little more detail about some of the questions that I had on my autobiographical questionnaire.  We had a nice visit and the Lord actually allowed me an opportunity to tell her about when my Daddy got saved several years ago.  It's a long story how we got to that.. but it was perfect!! I think we both shed a few tears:)
She will meet with Bobby in the next week or so for their individual meeting and then we will be close to the end of the homestudy.  It will all be sent to our adoption agency to be approved after the meeting. I have been diligently working on our profile book.  No kidding, I bet I have put at least 15 or more hours into it.  There is so much more to it than I realized.  It's been alot of fun to do, just time consuming.  We know it will all be worth it in the end though and we can't hardly wait!!
     I've had a few people ask me about the donate button on the blog and how it works.  As you see, we have a fundraising thermometer there for you to see when we receive donations or raise money through a fundraiser.  If you click the "Donate" button, it goes to a paypal account that we have set up.  After a donation is made, it sends me an email letting me know and then I have to personally go to the account and move the money to a savings account that we have set up specifically for the adoption.  Then I will go in and update the thermometer each time a donation is made!  I have to say again that we are overwhelmed at the amount of people that have been so supportive of this adoption.  We have so many wonderful friends and family that we know are behind us 100% and pray for us daily.  Thank you so much!!!!!!!
     Also, we are trying to get a t-shirt fundraiser together soon.  We wish we were already doing it but these last couple of weeks have been so busy with the last bit of paperwork, the profile book and the education.  We each are required to have 12 hours of adoption education.  We are reading and listening to radio interviews on a website and then taking quizzes for a certificate.  It's all been very interesting and we have learned so much!

Two Posts in one day!!

I know this is the second post today but I have to add this.  I was looking up a few things about adoption today and I ran across this...

                                LEGACY OF AN ADOPTED CHILD

Once there were two women who never knew each other
One you do not remember, the other you call Mother

Two different lives shaped to make you one
One became your guiding star, the other became your sun

The first one gave you life, and the second taught you to live it
The first gave you a need for love, the second was there to give it

One gave you a nationality, the other gave you a name
One gave you a talent, the other gave you aim

One gave you emotions, the other calmed your fears
One saw your first sweet smile, the other dried you tears

One made an adoption plan, that was all that she could do
The other prayed for a child, and God led her straight to you.

Now, which of these two women, Are you the product of?
Both, my darling, Both, Just two different types of love.

- Unknown

I can honestly say from the bottom of my heart that I am already in love with this little one that God has chosen for our family.  I never dreamed that you could love someone so much that you don't even know yet.  It's truly amazing and we both know that God is all over this.  We pray daily for the birthparents.  Even our children are specific in what we pray for each of them.  I can't wait to meet this special little one and add them to our family.  I never realized our family wasn't complete.  So thankful for a God who knows better than we do!! Thanks again for following our journey!

BBQ

Well this weekend we had our first "non official" BBQ fundraiser.  Bobby was originally just going to cook one boston butt on friday night and use it to make some brunswick stew.   A friend of mine said that her dad wanted to buy one if Bobby would cook an extra.  Then she said that her mother in law would like one too.  So I decided to put a little post on our facebook page and see if anyone else would be interested in buying one.  I told everyone that all proceeds would go toward the adoption.  It was so last minute that we really needed to know within a few hours who would want to participate.  We ended up having a great response and between the BBQ sales and a couple of unexpected donations, we were able to raise $300 for our adoption fund!!

                                               Before

                                               
                                                            After

 It was very exciting to see our fundraising thermometer rise again!!  Our first donation was from the paypal donate button for $50.00.   We can't even express how thankful we are for all of our friends that have been so supportive of our decision to adopt!!  Right now we are trying to get a T-shirt fundraiser together hopefully real soon.  We are so excited about this one and already have something in mind for it.

Our First Home Study Visit!!!

Today was the THE day!!  Our first home study visit.  I will have to say I was very excited about the visit but I was pretty nervous as well.  As it turns out, I had absolutely no reason to be nervous.  It went just as smooth as silk!  She got here about 3:30 and the first thing she did was "interview" my boys.  She really just asked them a few questions like.. Do you know what I'm here for, Do you know what it means to adopt, How do you feel about adoption, Are you excited about getting a baby brother/sister, Do you think your parents are good parents, and finally... How are you disciplined when you do something you aren't supposed to do?  Thankfully both boys understood and answered all of her questions. Our social worker seemed satisfied with all of their answers and after about 5 min with them,  their Mimi got them and they went to the park and to get dinner.  They had much more fun getting out of the house rather than sitting here for the next few hours trying to be quiet.  The whole visit was about 2 1/2  hours so it would have been a nightmare for them to be here the whole time. Ha!!  First she sat down with us and we went over all of the paperwork that we have been getting together for the last couple of weeks.  She answered some questions we had and gave great advice about several things to help us finish up with the paperwork.  Then she asked us a few questions about how we decided to adopt, how did we think parenting an adopted child would be different than parenting a biological child ( Hard question), and how would we manage parenting if this child was different than our biological children.  She went over some safety things with us that we need to make sure we have.  You have to have a fire extinguisher, a smoke detector on each level of the house,  you have to have a separate safe for ammunition and guns, medicines up high enough so a child can't reach it, cleaning supplies behind a childproof lock...etc.  Most of these we already have so that's good!  Then lastly she walked through the house.  That's all.. just walked through.  She didn't look in any closets, cabinets, drawers.  I had no idea what all she would do but I was just under the impression that it was going to be alot more "intimidating" than it was.  So all that nervousness was for nothing:)  Now she will meet with me in a couple weeks by myself and then with Bobby a couple weeks later by himself and by then hopefully we will have the FBI fingerprints back and can move forward and get all of this to our agency!!  I know this seems like alot of  info but I want to be able to look back at this one day if I forget and also who knows who else may run across this blog and be wondering what a home study is like:)

A Football weekend

We have had a great weekend!!  Friday night we went to the Eastside homecoming game to see our niece who was on the homecoming court for her sophomore class.  She was beautiful!  The kids had a great time watching the game and spending time with friends and cousins.

 Saturday started our cold and raining but that didn't keep us from heading out to our church for our last flag football game of the season.  All of the kids had a blast playing in the rain.  The adults...not so much:)  Thankfully it only rained the first few minutes and both boys teams won their games.  Bobby's team finally pulled off their first win of the season.  He was coaching 4-7 yr olds and most of them had never played before but had a great time learning.  Bobby was great with the kids and really enjoyed every minute of coaching them.  After the game, we had our awards ceremony and all of the kids got trophies.  Camden was extra thrilled because this was his first trophy!!  He was so proud of it!  Jaxon has had others in the past but was excited about this one too!

 Saturday night we went to my parents house for homemade chicken enchiladas and got to spend time with my sweet sweet grandmother.  She is the most amazing lady in the world!! She is my last grandparent living and just adores my boys.  It's so sweet to watch her with them and I know how much they love her too.  Then today of course was church.  We had a great service and some sweet friend had their precious baby dedicated to the Lord this morning.  It brought tears to my eyes (but what doesn't:)) as I sat there thinking that we will get to do that again one day!! When we got home Bobby said that as he watched the dedication, he was imagining our family up there doing that very same thing again one day and that he couldn't wait!!  I'm so thankful to have such a wonderful, Godly husband that is on the same page with me about the adoption.

First fundraising opportunity

YAY!!! We finally got our Donate button added to the blog!!  I am including our fundraising letter so that each of you could understand a little more about how we got to this point and the adoption process as a whole.

 Dear friends and family,

     Hello from Bobby and Tiffany Ray.  We write with great joy and big news to share… We're adopting!!  About 2 months ago we began a journey of faith to bring a child into our family through adoption.  The possibility of adopting had been on our minds for years but even more in the past several months.   About a year ago, I asked Bobby how does someone know if they are being called by God to do something.  He said "well it would be something that you had on your mind all the time and couldn't get away from it no matter how hard you tried."  I immediately began to cry and knew from that moment on that God was calling our family to adoption.  

I can honestly say for a full year, it was in my thoughts constantly I tried hard to run from the idea. While we were filled with excitement, at the same time we were filled with fear.  We felt comfortable with our life now and wondered how would this change our lives as a whole. What about our plan for our life?  Our kids are 10 and 7.  They are both in the "easier" stage of life and we all know each others routine.  This seemed so much out of MY comfort zone! We also wondered.. could we afford another child?  Better yet, how could we afford adoption at all?  As the year passed, I still had it on my mind a lot, although it wasn't something that we discussed often at all.  As a matter of fact, NOT at all.  One day I had been overwhelmed with the feeling and had prayed and cried about adoption all day.  When Bobby got home that day, I told him that later I had something I needed to talk to him about.  He immediately walked over to me, hugged me and said "It's about adoption isn't it?  I asked him how in the world he knew that and he let me know that it had been on his mind as well and he would LOVE to pursue it!! I am typically not a person of change and we realized this would be a HUGE change!  We realized then that God was calling us out of our comfort zone.  I read somewhere that God doesn't call the qualified, he qualifies the called!!!

Through all of our fears, we felt God graciously guiding the way.  All in his perfect timing, he led us to the right articles and books, allowed us to speak with others who have recently been down this road, and to spend time in heartfelt prayer, seeking his perfect will.  In September of this year, we filled out an application and were approved with an adoption agency.  The adoption process is completed at different stages.  First we are required to have a home study.  The home study is tons of paperwork and 3 visits done by a social worker that will determine if we are suitable to be parents.  At this time, we are in the middle of doing our homestudy.  During this time we are required to prepare a "Dear Birthmother" letter and a profile book with photos and captions that tell all about our family.   When our home study is complete, our profile book will be sent to the agency and at that time we will be put out there to be "matched" with a birthmom. The process could take up to a year or more but we are praying for less time than that.  Isn't it awesome that God already knows who, and when:)  Bobby and I feel so honored that God has chosen our family to raise a child that otherwise may not have a loving, Christian home. 

 

This is the reason we are writing this letter: would you pray about how you can help bring this little one home to join our family?  The domestic adoption process is very expensive and we knew from the beginning that we couldn't do it on our own.  We also know that If God calls us to do something, he will provide!!  Between the home study, agency fees, travel, hotel expenses and attorney fees, the cost will be about $25,000.  

We plan to cover the cost in a few ways:  first we are living frugally and plan to save as much of our income as we possibly can for the adoption.  Second, after our home study is complete, we can apply for adoption grants, Also after the adoption is complete we will apply for a federal tax credit which will equal about $12,000.  And finally, we will be fundraising and asking for donations.

Would you be willing to help us bring our child home?  We are asking for any donation that you may be able to give.  No amount is too small.  We are humbled and appreciative of your gifts in any amount.  Also, donations are tax deductible.  You can also find out about upcoming fundraisers and follow our adoption journey at our website  www.fourwantingmore.blogspot.com   

Most importantly we are asking you pray for us and our child.  The adoption process is filled with both joy and anxiety.  Our ultimate prayer is that through our adoption, God's glory will be made known.  Please pray that we will trust and obey God through every step of this journey.  

Thank you in advance for your love and support, 

Bobby and Tiffany Ray

A New Beginning

Well here it goes! My first attempt at blogging. All I can say is I'm not making any promises:)  The reason we created this blog is to keep track of our journey to adoption and for other people to be able to follow our journey as well.  Bobby and I feel like God has been calling our family to adoption for several years now. It's something that has been brought up many times between the two of us but we always just "talked" about it.  About 2 mos ago, I began to realize that I could no longer run from the calling and we both prayed about it and decided it was time to follow the call.  On Sept. 23, 2013, we filled out our application for adoption with Nightlight Christian Adoptions.  Since then, we have filled out paperwork, and more paperwork, and more paperwork.  No really...it's a ton of paperwork.  We are in the middle of our homestudy now and we have a social worker coming out next week to start the homestudy meetings.  We are absolutely ecstatic about this next step in our life and our boys are thrilled too.  Recently several of our friends have had babies and our boys are getting in some pretty good practice!!